make a list

Usually when we’re settled in bed, we’re mostly settled. Lately though we’ve had a lot of bed company and it makes discovering other things a little more difficult but I don’t mind. The kittens are getting adventurous and it amuses me to no end, to be honest. Most of them sleep in the cats’s room. We’ve set up extra beds and extra towers and they’re discovering the joys of so many things.

Right now though, it’s somewhere around early morning. The sun has just barely begun to peek through the curtains. I’ve slept all I could sleep and I guess this is why I’m just sitting, propped up on my pillow with a pencil in my hand and a pad of paper against my knees. Next to me, Quentin is still sound asleep. Coby is against his knees and Maris at the foot of the bed. I saw Areli playfully chasing Izar out and about earlier. These kittens are growing up so fast.

I’ve managed to fall back into the easier desire to sketch. I still don’t do it as much as I used to but I feel a certain satisfaction in knowing I do sketch now when I hadn’t in some time. I haven’t touched the clay or the brand new camera we did get for me though I’ve looked it over from all angles. I think I’ll be using it before too long. I see it now, the walls plastered with pictures of cats, more cats, some Quentin, some more cats and a lot of flowers.

Next to me, Quentin stirs lightly and he rubs his eyes as he shifts his weight closer to me. He stops when he realizes I’m not in my usual position and he blinks, looking up to me. I smile at him softly and reach out to brush some hair from his face. He sighs and closes his eyes, nuzzling against my thigh. I chuckle and shake my head.

“What are you doing?” his words are soft and drowsy still. I look at the mostly empty paper on my knees and I shrug.

“I started sketching the kittens as they came on and off the bed but then I lost sight of them so I just started making a list.”

“What of?”

“This and that. Places we’d like to visit, things we might need, stuff I should take photos of.”
“We already have a list of places we’d like to visit.”

I laugh and shrug. He has a point. I look at the half-list on my lap again and I try to make sense of the words I’ve written. I don’t honestly see much of anything connecting any of those things together. “I might have just been writing down everything that was crossing my mind while you were resting, really.”

At times it’s just like that, I’ll start in on something and realize that it’s not really going much of anywhere so I just let it be. I keep on doing whatever I was doing and in the end, even if the results don’t go anywhere, I keep it. It’s abstract art in its own way.

After we’ve rounded up all seven of our housemates and fed them, I disappear up in to the garden for the next hour or two. This is routine by now. I check up on the growth of flowers, fruits and vegetables. I clip what has gone over its prime. I gather flowers and hang them up to dry. It’s a lot of work but it’s good, exhausting work and I love doing it.

We still don’t open up this area to the cats. I don’t know how they would take to it. I suppose we could but I don’t know that we feel safe in thinking they might just start to dig up stuff and we’re not really ready for that.

When I’m done with my garden work, I make sure I’m not tracking dirt everywhere and I head back down to the main floors. The day, though still early, is already showing signs of being a hot, steamy one. I think time in the pool will be interesting.
We go around the rooms and close the curtains to keep the coolness in the house and the heat outside. It’s one of those things we’ve gotten into the habit of doing else the house just gets uncomfortably hot, even with the AC going.

My randomly half-written list is still on the kitchen counter when we come back there as a meeting point and I look it over. I honestly don’t know what was going through my mind. It has things on there that just don’t connect. Portugal, apples, stars, dreams, flowers. There’s a bit of everything on there and I might manage to make more sense of it later on, for now I don’t think too much about it.

We spend the next few hours just settled in the living room, listening to low music and relaxing. The cats come and come, playing, jumping, learning. Tonight is a shared meal night, it might be why we’re currently taking things so easily. We just like to have a lot of peaceful moments between us before we go up to Alexis’s and Eoghan’s place for that shared meal and movie. It’s wonderful time, everyone together but it can get exhausting.

I might take the camera with. It might be a good starting point. Take photos of everyone. Maybe I can do a sort of mural outside or just start it on canvas and move it on something bigger before too long. Put everyone in there. I think we could all like that. Or maybe I could do what I’d done some months back with Quentin, paint us back in time, or in the future. It might depend but that could be interesting. Paint us all as if we were from another century.

For Alexis and Eoghan I know they’ve been through those times and they are from another century—in Alexis’s case another millennium—so it might not be so farfetched but for the rest of us who have been born in this century and have been living here, I think that a mock sight into what we could have been like in the past could be interesting.

I don’t know why I’m so fascinated with things from the past like this. It’s just how I am I guess and I just like the idea of discovering things gone by. Maybe I should have been an archaeologist. One of these folks who dig up old bones and study them and whatnot.

I know there’s just so much I could be doing honestly that I don’t know where I would begin. Not that it matters, I have a lot of time ahead of me, time to discover new things and to figure out the world as a whole. I know I have a lot. I know I should be thankful for all I have and I am.

Though I’m most thankful for Quentin and the life we have now, of course. Without him I wouldn’t be around and I don’t know that I’d still have my life. At times it hurts when I think back about Sterling and how he lost is life but that is in the past and I do all I can to not focus on that. I have a present, I have a future. I can’t just forget the past but I can spend as little time as I can thinking about it.

I think I’ll do that mural. Though first as a regular painting, I have a huge canvas waiting for me in my studio. I’d first thought of setting it up as a landscape but I might just see about using it for us instead. To depict our growing family. I might see about adding signs of Adela and the cats. Just add in everyone and everything that surrounds us.

That’s a good idea.


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